Can You Have A Healthy, Committed Relationship Without Marriage?

A generation ago, marriage was an obvious and assumed step into adulthood and commitment. Today, many people find themselves wondering, is marriage actually the precursor to either commitment or happiness?! 

 

To what extent does marriage define commitment? To what extent does marriage indicate the security and healthy feelings or behaviors that are meant to come with it? Does marriage contribute to, let alone guarantee fidelity, financial security, trust, or happiness? 

 

Let’s face it, marriage does not in and of itself guarantee a commitment. 

We are all too aware of the statistics about infidelity and divorce. So walking down the aisle and signing a document do not in any way guarantee a real commitment. 

 

At the same time, the experience of commitment is a necessary component of a healthy, securely functioning bond that lasts. 

The reason for this is that commitment provides several necessary psychological conditions necessary for...

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If You're Anxious About Your Relationship, Repeat These 9 Affirmations Everyday

Be secure in your relationship.

When anxiety about your relationship attacks, there is a solution to curb those anxious feelings: positive affirmations.

While we don’t choose our feelings, we do choose our belief systems and our belief systems give rise to our feelings and reactions to situations....

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If You Have These 9 Thoughts About Your Relationship, It’s Probably A Healthy One

One of the most powerful relationship skills you can have is knowing what a healthy relationship looks and feels like. Most people know what hasn’t worked for them, but have a hard time defining and feeling confident picking a healthy relationship. This is especially tricky because we know that healthy relationships are not “perfect” relationships! 

 

Dr. Judith Wallerstein did some fantastic research about the commonalities of healthy relationships. She was the first researcher to ask what healthy relationships actually felt like to the people in them. Her primary finding was that a healthy relationship feels like a unique, co-created world that the two partners share. Every “world” is different, but this qualitative presence exists in all of the healthy relationships she studied. 

 

How do you know if you’re in a relationship that has this quality, even when it’s hard? Or if you’re beginning a relationship that...

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Dating Advice For Introverts: 6 Things You Need To Know

dating wisely Jun 13, 2019

Introverts, despite their relative tendency to thrive on and need alone-time to regenerate and feel healthy, also need love, connection and commitment -- like their extroverted counterparts! The reason is simple. We’re all human. Humans’ primary need is for warmth, connection, belonging, understanding, and the meaning of a role in one’s world. But, introverts go about connection differently, and so it stands that there shall be dating advice for introverts!

 

To divide the world into introverts and extroverts is certainly an oversimplification, but the concept is useful if we understand ourselves on a spectrum of introversion and extroversion. If you are an introvert, you will necessarily need time away from others to recharge your energetic battery. This is the most profound way to understand introversion and extroversion.

 

Extroverts, on the other hand, need social contact to recharge their batteries, and never quite feel refreshed without this. Most...

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3 Ways to Practice More Empowered Dating

We all know that there are self-care practices and understandings that help us become better daters. However, there are a lot of mixed messages and, in my opinion, un-useful clichés about personal self-care and dating that aren’t helping anyone. For instance, what does it mean to “love yourself first”?.....

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3 Ways to Prepare Yourself for Empowered Dating

Empowered dating starts with an empowered you. Don’t know where to start? Get clear and connected to these three things and you’ll be well on your way....

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Self-Compassion: The Key to Extraordinary Relationships

When I talk to my patients about self-care they often go to ideas of spa days and bubble baths. Sure, those things can be a form of self-care, however the self-care I find transformative centers around the practice of self-compassion. Now, if your next thought is associations of pity, letting yourself off the hook, anything goes, you are "Way Off Base!"....

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Know Your Story

Who wouldn’t love to know what to do with all of that interest and excitement about your future relationship before you have found the one?! Take that energy and intention and put it into understanding the basics of healthy relationships and your dating life will become more satisfying as you feel empowered and educated about the task you are undertaking....

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If The Man You Love Has These 4 Personality Traits, He's A Genuine Keeper

Do not let this man go!

Do you have a list of the qualities and characteristics you’d to find like in a man? Many women (and men) do.

However, most lists of this kind are based on personal dating preferences, so they don't necessarily take into account the specific personality traits that really matter when it in comes to determining whether or not a guy has what it takes to form happy, healthy bonds as a boyfriend or husband....

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People With These 3 Personality Traits Are The Most Likely To Be High-Functioning Sociopaths

Proceed with serious caution.

We've all had the experience of meeting someone who seems to be "off" somehow, but in a way it's extremely difficult to put a finger on.

Dating and falling in love with a person whose personality traits turn out to be so truly twisted as to raise suspicions that they might have antisocial personality disorder will leave your self-esteem and ability to trust deeply damaged, possibly even causing you to doubt your own perceptions of reality....

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